road blocks & roller coasters ? Incredible Family

Every morning Jack Jack springs out of bed and excitedly asks ?is foster sister here yet??. ?I understand that he doesn?t fully understand the reality of having a baby in the house, but its still the cutest thing ever. ?He?s been telling everyone about ?foster sister? and both boys were excited when they overheard me talking about our home visit scheduled this week?Dash immediately said with excitement ?oh! is the baby coming today???

We knew that foster care & adoption was going to be a long and bumpy journey, and this week has only proved that to be true.

When we started this process, we always looked at foster care as an avenue to adoption. ?We knew it might not be the first or even the fourth baby, but eventually a baby in our home would be freed for adoption and as sad as that moment would be for our foster child, we would be ready and willing to make them a permanent part of our family.

We also did know, however, that we had some obstacles to overcome since we have a tight 2-bedroom home. ?The sitting area outside the master bedroom upstairs has served as our adorable nursery for both boys, but doesn?t exactly meet ?state regulations?. ?Our social worker knew we had a plan for a friend to put a wall up in order to gain the necessary adoption approval when that time came and both she and her supervisor had assured us that that would work for us.

Imagine our surprise when we failed our adoption home visit this week. ?Not because of a lack of a wall not yet installed, but because the ceilings are too low?thus making the room just 5 square feet too small to qualify for adoption. ?That?s it, just a tiny little roadblock. ?Just a few square feet too short.

We were devastated. ?We just couldn?t see how we were going to make it work. ?Our builder friend graciously came and looked at the space again and we determined?again?that we just don?t have the finances to undertake a home expansion. ?We talked and talked and just can?t imagine opening our home to a child and knowing that there would be no way to keep her/him if they needed a permanent home. ?That would be too incredibly painful and we?re not willing to subject ourselves to that possibility.

So for the past several days, it?s been too painful for me to talk about; just walking past this sight every day brought me to tears every time?.

We?ve been doing some soul searching, though, as well as asking ourselves how far are we willing to go for this?

Ultimately, both of us feel extremely strongly that this dream is worth fighting for, that people are worth potential inconveniences to us, and that we want to find a way to make it work. ?We also both feel that despite some of our strong emotions this week?of disappointment and doubt, that God?s timing IS perfect. ?Whether this happens in a month, or in three years when we?ve saved up more money and are able to change our circumstances, it will be okay. ?Maybe the child who needs us most isn?t ready for us yet!

So where do we go from here? ? We?ll take too big of a loss on our house if we sell in this market, and we can?t afford to expand, and the baby has to have their own room in order for us to qualify for adoption, and we only have two bedrooms. ?Stumped.

And then, just like that, literally just when I came to peace with whatever and whenever, a solution was right in front of me: ? our dining room could be our bedroom and the baby could have our room. ?We don?t use our formal living room and could easily move our dining room things into our living room. It will make our house feel much smaller, and we won?t have a beautiful decorative living room, but does that really matter? ?We can put a wall or doors up in the dining room to turn it into an official bedroom, and we?re all set. ?Inconsequential cost, and a huge bedroom for baby:)?hee hee. ?And when that baby is ours forever, we?ll have a wall tearing down party. ?Feels pretty symbolic, huh?

As with all of our decisions, we need to let it sit with us for a few days and make sure this is how we?re going to move forward. ?I also need to consult with our social worker and the home inspector again and determine does this room have to be ready before we begin fostering or can we create the room once the fostering looks like it will move toward adoption?

Road blocks & roller coasters?..all part of this journey. ?Isn?t that how life works, though? ? My first two miracles were full of incredible road bumps and at times road blocks and it was all worth it in the end. ?So little Miss Lyla is creating drama already, that?s what girls do best:)

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Source: http://myincrediblefamily.com/road-blocks/

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